It's 10.30pm and MB is going to call it a night. She's been emptying out her herbs and spices into the trash so that she can recycle the glass bottles. It's breaking her heart to be throwing things away, particularly things she's cooked with with such pleasure and which could still be used to create more sumptuous dinners by another chef -- but she barely lets it show. Just one groan have I heard all day.
Dini came by at 7.30pm and in two hours she carted away two shopping-carts' full of stuff. She took down the vitrages (on the Rijswijk side); the stained glass square that hung between the hall and the living room; the hazy green-and-brown village scene oil paiting that hung in the entry hall; a whole collection of Huub'a postcards (Tchad, Amalfi, Shenandoah) and boxes to store them in; the collection of classical music cassettes, including the lecture course; picture frames; book ends; living plants and fake flowers; an old shaver, camera, and radio. Then it was down to the berging (storage unit) for the Christmas tree and ornaments; the five red geometric-patterned Persian rugs; a light folding chair and a bike pump. Mom discovered a box of things with my name on it -- the rest of the Jezzine ware, and a copper-and-tin bowl and plate.
She had her 2 year old black poodle Romeo, successor to Boris (who lived to be 17), along -- who responded unexpectedly amorously to my scratching behind the ears, first licking me vigorously then mounting my knee. Dini curbed his behavior.
Dini has an edge to her personality that puts off MB & H a little. Maybe it's that she walks like a dyke, but I don't think so. She has a faintly blustering way about her, and a keen commercial edge. It's probably that she talks too much about her (poor) health and how much things cost. She worked at ING before it became ING, and retired at 54. She was offered a promotion two levels up, but didn't want to work for the new firm. She had her antiques business on the side, and devoted more time to that while benefiting from a comfortable ING pension. Now 70, she still spends Sundays at the antiques market in The Hague. She's been sick since MB & H's farewell borrel, and standing outside in the cold didn't help. She didn't make any money last Sunday either. Not a single Euro. None of the dealers did. Customers have their pocket books zipped shut. Her flat (on the 2nd floor, opposite corner of triangle from MB & H) is nicely furnished with good wood furniture, antique chandeliers, and a collection of 18th century red & blue chinaware on the wall.
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When I first arrived the first things I missed were the dining room table and the mirrors. The dining room table was a repository for things that needed to get done, or be put away; and was a relativley quiet place to sit and 'work' (or do finger exercises, or read the paper) when the kitchen became too much. And the mirrors -- well, I realize in their absence how I used to check my appearance before emerging from the bedroom in the morning, glance in the hallway mirror before I leaving the flat or returning to the living room from the toilet, peripherally acknowledge myself in Mom's long-skinny study mirror.
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I rescued handfuls of photos today. First a stack of old (1920s, 30s,40s) photos that Huub was returning to Dettie, per her written instructions on a notecard on top of the pile. But since she'd written that note, she's had a stroke and been told she'd be dead from a kidney tumor by now. And she doesn't think her own children would be particularly interested in the old photos. So it went from her telling me I should select a few to keep, to her asking me if it was alright if she kept two or three for herself. There are photos of Oma and Opa Morsink, and of Marietje / Mieke, Monique (Moni), Dettie, Huub and Ageeth (Ati) when they were pre-teens; photos of the first-born grandchildren -- Meindert and Monique born in Australia, and Mariette Dettie's eldest; and two historical gems, one of the bridge by Vlake bombed on May 2nd 1940, and another from the Watersnood of 1953. Huub was going to throw away his ration card from WWII when he was living in the Tweede Emmastraat in Haarlem, but I said I wanted it.
He also jettisoned a lot of more recent photos. Just threw them away. When he and MB left for the doctor's together, I went through his trash, suspecting he was throwing away family treasures. Admittedly, many are duplicates of photos Jim or Paul are likely to have, of Kalila and Silas when they were young for example; and he did give me the photos of me he's kept over the years -- but there were a few of himself over time, and with MB, that I don't think I'd be able to find anywhere else and are in any case nice to have in once place.
I didn't tell H Dettie had given me the old Morsink family photos, or that I salvaged photos from his trash; I just put them in some empty photo albums that were destined for the kringloop, and will mail them to MB care of J in DC.
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Dettie came by at 10am with her downstairs buurman (Paul?) to collect the exercise bicycle. He ended up taking it apart with the special spanner that came with it. I thought the point was that he'd come with a van large enough not to have to do that. Dettie ended up not wanting the botanical illustration of the orange flowers, or the plate with the dove on it, after all. She did take the wine glasses -- Gabrielle had them on her wish-list for Sinterklaas. H gave Dettie a small photo of them when they were kids; she tucked it in her inside jacket pocket, and he smiled a warm happy smile (for her or for him, I'm not sure; but he clearly felt he'd done something good). When we were looking at the pile of old photos together in the kitchen, she remembered he'd given her a photo, but I had to remind her where she put it. "I'm glad you remember; he'd be upset with me if I forgot it."
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Monique came by at 4pm to collect things she'd expressed an interest in. The papyrus I'd brought back from Egypt, for example. Monique said the ducks made her think of family coming together, and she was going to hang it above her dining table. She took a bunch of kitchen stuff, including spices and the weighing scales ("I'll think of Marybeth when I'm baking!"); and three plants MB had raised from wee shoots.
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Erika, MB's hairdresser on the Waldhoorn Plein, snipped off my sun-bleached ends and trimmed my bangs from 2 to 3pm. MB has her last appointment on Friday, and we're going to film the process so a DC hairdresser will know what works on MB's hair. Blow drying really doesn't; rollers do.
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Journal:
Woke up at 8am, probably 'cause I heard MB&H talking; I'd stayed up watching TV till about 2.30am. MB was all hugs and smiles, the dis-connect of last night gone like it never happened. Took some more nails out of the walls and took down the over-door-window coverings. Figured out where to get a paper shredder in Rijswijk. Ageeth called and H explained Mali was on the other side of Africa from Malawi (she supports a charity in Malawi, and word is getting out I'm going to Mali), and I thanked her for the boekenbon she'd sent along for me. 10am Dettie came by with her neighbor to collect the exercise bike. I'm not sure where she disappeared to, but at one point we were left drinking coffee with the neighbor, whose half-brother lives 150km outside of Boston and works for Honeywell. After they left I completed my UK Taxes, which I thought were due October 1st (in which case I'd have been late). Upon finding out it was due October 31st, I almost put it off but MB said, 'Just do it.' Submitting my taxes on paper by the end of October means HMRC will calculate my taxes for me. Around noon MB prepared lunch (can you believe it, she's still serving up three meals a day; incredible) of left-over Vichysoise, pork tenderloin with cumin and allspice, mashed potatoes, witlof, and carrots. MB & H left for Dr Wai's office to drop off the Asbury medical forms right after lunch, and I took the opportunity to go through H's trash to salvage photos he'd thrown away. 2pm hair appointment with Erika. MB stopped in on the way back from Dr Wai; she deposited the glass at the Waldhoorn recycling even though I'd said I'd do it. Got farewell cards for MB & H at the natural foods store next door. Home about 3.30pm, and started to rip up MB's old checks, before deciding to check if Renier had a shredding machine. Turns out he does...but it's broken... but his buddy Barry on the 17th floor on the other side of the building has one that works, and Barry will be home at 4.30pm. Monique arrived at 4pm, I went to Barry's and shredded checks at 4.30pm, Monique left around 6pm and it was time for dinner. MB & I had the lovely fish soup Monique had thoughtfully brought by, and I finished off the gember kip I'd missed last night. We finished dinner and cleaned up the kitchen in timefor Dini's arrival, and spent the next couple of hours loading her up with stuff. Huub was already in bed by the time we returned to the flat about 9.15pm. The three times I looked in on H in his study during the course of the day he was 1. throwing away photos, 2.eating an ice-cream, 3. looking up news on Mali. His study looks much the same as it did when I arrived last Friday. He doesn't have the energy for this. 'I've had to be stern with him,' says MB. She sympathises that he's not getting in his afternoon nap, nor his daily bike ride. I tried to be cheerful over dinner, sharing the good news of international bookstores and liqour stores carrying creme de cassis in DC, and he did seem to brighten. On the flip side, he's commented I talk very fast, too fast, and at times has gotten irritated not being able to follow MB & my (mundane, logistics-focused) table conversation. Caught Lucy S in London as she signed into Skype, and had a brief chat. She looks good, framed against her pink office wall. MB said a brief hello, congratulating Lucy on her baby and upcoming book, and Lucy wished her all the best with the move. Then MB was supposed to go to bed,, but I heard her still tapping away on the computer at 11.45pm. She was having difficulty signing up for vehicular assistance (preferably a buggy) on the BA website, and I got that sorted. She was very grateful. She really is a grateful person. There are times when it feels forced, but I'd say she puts out so much gratitude that those times are but drops in an overflowing bucket. Then she collapsed into bed. She is exhausted. One more seriously difficult day, getting everything ready for the kringloop to take away. Then the kringloop comes Thursday, and the carpets etc get ripped out on Friday. I made a reservation at the Savelberg for Thursday night. That puta smile on MB's face. Friday we're having a borrel with Renier, Aad & Joke. Saturday Gies is taking us out to dinner. (Sunday and Monday the Savelberg is closed). Monday, Karen & Henie and Monique are coming by the Bastion Hotel for a farewell drink. (And me? Let's see... Wed: sort out Dettie's skype; post office with posters and photos; arrange storage of copper plate with Axel; Fri: lunch with Boudewijn in Rotterdam; Tues: dinner with Pieter in Landsmeer).
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